Wednesday 13 May 2009

Link-tastic alternative team of... well some other years


Morning folks,

Before I pick a team of the season I thought I’d club together a team of seasons past for some YouTubeTainment. Not the greatest side of all time or anything, just frankly a load of good footballers, mainly from the ‘90s that anybody’s day would be improved by watching. It’s a three-five-two combo for maximum midfield genius effect, so for those with a go slow day in work get yourself some…

GK:
Packie Bonner: Forgive the somewhat dodgy soundtrack but that penalty save is buried somewhere in this nice bit of Reeling in the Years nostalgia. Quality keeper in his day too.

Right side of back three:
Lilian Thuram: Only barely retired (though considering my choice on the left wing that’s hardly an issue), this guy was a fantastic player. Played in an excellent Parma side alongside Cannavaro and Buffon, then the three eventually joined up to win shitloads at Juve. Okay, he may have had to give back a league medal or two thanks to yer man Moggi, but we won’t hold it against him.

Left side of back three:
Ronald Koeman: Fat chump of a manger who is working hard to ruin the memory of himself as a great player (see Michel Platini’s public standing for further reference). The truffle-shuffler could score free kicks though.

Centre back:
Roy Keane: I’m going to keep the Rolls in the garage (thank you Eamon Dunphy). Or, alternatively, Tony Adams as the poor fucker hasn’t had much luck this past year.

Holding midfielder:
Lothar Matthäus: Okay he wasn’t one in his peak but he became a decent holding midfielder before Makelele ‘invented’ the role, plus he always struck me as an absolute bastard which I admire in any German player. No one likes them anyway, so why not revel in it.

Right side, centre midfield:
Zvonimir Boban: He gon’ fuck you up muthhafukka! Alright Boban may well have gained notoriety for kicking a cop who was beating seven shades of shit out of a Dinamo Zagreb supporter, but this guy was a superb player, who played for Milan at their peak, winning four league titles. Never a great goal scorer but rarely mis-hit a pass. And he kicked an Eastern European cop for fuck sake, have some respect; they make bodies disappear for sport.

Left side, centre midfield
Peter Beardsley: Beyond the everlasting mystery of what exactly he did to his barber that led to that haircut; and indeed looking past the story that Craig Johnston was convinced to quit football after realising he didn’t want to end up anything like the Geordie; we should all remember that Beardsley was a superb player and a central part of one of the great Liverpool sides before a career renaissance in Kevin Keegan’s nearly great Newcastle team.

Right wing
Dejan Savićević: What a player. A long time ODF favourite, he was an integral part in the European Cup-winning Red Star Belgrade side that, thankfully, neither Rob Smyth nor Jonathan Wilson will let people forget about. Of course, he then went on to Milan where… well he was this good.

Left wing:
Ryan Giggs: Because the fucker ain’t getting in my team of the season so thought I’d throw him in with a load of legends. As a Liverpool fan, I hate that I can’t hate him.

Centre forward:
Marco can Basten: As obvious as it necessary, the poor guy had to retire years too early and now has to suffer the humiliation of admitting he’s just not very good at coaching after fairly poor spells with Holland and Ajax. His name should ensure at least one more top job though – Frank Rijkaard of course came from putting Sparta Rotterdam into the Dutch second division to somehow get the Barca job so anything is possible. Well some things are only possible if you’re Marco van Basten.

Centre forward:
Ronaldo: The real one, and the one from the 1996/97 season on this particular dream team.

Back with a slightly more humdrum team of this season later.

Cheers, JJ

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