Friday, 21 November 2008

What could go wrong?

This week, this is what I mostly think will happen... (obscure Fast Show reference explained here)

Aston Villa v Man Utd: This game is built for United. Villa, a team on the up but perpetually scared of the United crest coming within 100 yards of them, will collapse at some stage here. It might come late but they will collapse. United on the other hand have injury worries but the best frontline on the planet so they should be fine, though no doubt Ferguson’s post match press conference will make it sound as if without Ferdinand, Brown and Berbatov they were down to the bare bones (copyright: Arry Redknapp). 1-3
Chelsea v Newcastle: Farckin ‘ell Joe Kinnear’s not done too bad has he? The resurrection of Damien Duff, Oba Martins playing well again and not caving in to Michael Owen. Good man. He’ll get the shit ripped out of him here though. 3-0
Liverpool v Fulham: Hmmm… It’s been Steven Gerrard week on the ‘Pool’s official website as he’s celebrating 10 years in the first team. Will he mark it with a controversial return after his England absence? I hope he does as it’ll annoy Garth Crooks, which is always a good thing. Anyway, with or without him it’s a home win. Most likely nil all at half time but a win nonetheless, particularly with Torres likely to start. 2-0
Man City v Arsenal: Ooooooooh tough one, this should be a cracker and why it’s not on live TV is beyond me. Robinho should find plenty of space what with most of Arsenal’s defence reusing to go within ten yards of William ‘Infamy, infamy, they’ve all got it in for me’ Gallas. What a complete tosser this guy is though. First he says he has no friends at the club, then he rubbishes Theo Walcott’s style of play, has a strop at Birmingham, embarrasses himself with the team talk in their game against Chelsea last year, plays pretty poorly for the majority of his time at the club and even found himself out injured for eight weeks after kicking himself up the arse in training. Prat. Go on Citeh, increase the pain. 2-1.
Middlesbrough v Bolton: Oooooooh pointless one this… I shall talk no further. 1-0. Barnstorming.
Portsmouth v Hull: Hull stopped the rot last week and fair balls to them, I think they’ll lose a tight game here though as Donkey Kong continues to see Pompey improve after their substandard start to his reign. 2-1.
Stoke v West Brom: Oh dear. Let’s hope West Brom’s penchant for actually passing the ball helps them out here against a woeful to watch Stoke side. 0-1.
Sunderland v West Ham: Considering most of the Sunderland defence used to play for West ham, if they have any chance of a clean sheet it should come here. More pain for Zola I’d say – 2-0.
Tottenham v Blackburn: The big one, well it is for me as I’ve bet that Chelsea, Liverpool and Spurs will all be up at half time in their games. Foolish considering I already said Liverpool might take a while before beating Fulham, and even more foolish considering I think Spurs might struggle here. But screw it; the betting slip is in my hands now. 3-1 Spurs, hopefully 1-0 at least at half time… poppa needs a new pair o’ shoes.

Later, JJ


FP said...

And Bohs will win the Cup. (But don't let it bother you since it's in this country and you're too important for that).

JJ said...

Touchy touchy FP. So you're coming down from that high horse to watch the game then??

Be de jay shure you're only de salt of de earth with de bohs and dat.

Anonymous said...

Darragh Moloney is a stupid cunt!! That's it.

Anonymous said...

Saw Tommy Tiernan on celeb kop club. Always found him a bit smug but decent interview here and the bit about holding your breath when Traore got the ball kind of resonated. Stephen Ireland just pull a hamstring already!

jj said...

Saw that show with Tommy Tiernan and it was actually decent enough. I had pretty low expectations when I flicked over to it but he came across quite well. Yer man Bishop is usually horrendous too so surprises all round.