Friday, 20 April 2007

Blessed is the Fergie? Nah...

Alright folks,

JJ here

Well with the Premiership kicking into the home straight I have been struck down with a strange affliction which anyone who has listened to today's podcast will be well aware of. I am starting to love watching Chelsea. There's just something engrossing about every time they play with that weird assurance that they will ALWAYS (at Okeydokefootball we have a Sun/Mirror approach to capitalisation) score, and an array of players who can produce FANTASTIC (alright that's the last one) goals.

SWP's brace against West Ham was a perfect example and with Kalou, Essien, Mikel and Fat Lamps all in top form they are playing in a fast but skillful rhythm that few, if any, teams will cope with. The Guardian's Kevin McCarra has made the point that some people are starting to believe that if you don't like Chelsea this all of a sudden makes you a better person. It's a strange condition that has been rampant of late - former skunk-haired Spurs man Chris Waddle was the latest to jump on the bandwagon during the week.

He said he wanted United to win everything as Chelsea play a horrible brand of football.


I have been railing against this 'a victory for Man United is a victory for old fashioned values' bollocks for some time this season. A club that has a summer budget of over £30 million - and has had so since well before Ken Bates sold Chelsea to the Roman Army - are no champions of 'the people' as righteous column writers would put it.

Man United are a team who averaged 80 per cent of decisions in their league games up until the early part of this decade (no recent stats have come out on this but the latest penalty decisions both for and against Man U at Old Trafford would suggest little has changed); they are a team who are indulged by referees to a disgraceful degree and Paul Scholes lack of red cards over his career is a testament to that; they have played horrendous football in Europe for the past six years discounting the Roma game. Liquid football, my arse.

Their fans will quite rightly celebrate their league win - which considering the goal difference and Chelsea's run in should be secure. But just celebrate that your team has won the league, not that your team has SAVED (all right I lied) football and that everyone else should be grateful. This cuddly bear image of Man U doesn't sit well with the decade of hate they inspired pre-Mourinho.

If you're a Man U fan who hasn't claimed this, though I doubt many have resisted the temptation, I'm not referring to you. Indeed, Mark has been at pains to point out their fallibility this season on the podcast.

On another note, I will of course shelve this admiration for Chelsea during the week for the Champions League semis. I think Liverpool can win but it's all about stopping Essien who is the drive for the team at the moment; Drogba too will have to be marked out of the game, something I think Agger is capable of but only if he has one of his best games. If the occasion of the Champions League semis doesn't do that for the young Dane then there will be problems aplenty. Still, that's next week. Two great games, two great nights in front of the TV, beer in hand - that's the kind of religion I could get behind not the the cult of Man U 2007.

Repent! Repent!


Mr C said...

Jaysus, this is a cracking find. Without brown nosing, easily the funniest pod cast going.

I really don't think the league is Utd's yet. The 'Four point' lead (3pts and g/d) could vanish with a loss (Chelsea at Stamford Bridge?) and then the fear of throwing it away really kicks in. It would only take Man City or West Ham playing 10 men behind-the-ball to seek a draw in true nil-nil stylee.

I also think the loathing of Chelsea is maintained by the fact that they have an astonishing collection of tossers in Mourinho, Cashley, Drogba, Robben, Joe Cole and most of all king of all wankers Frank Lampard and his omerta-esqe idea towards criticism of him. Compared to Utd can only have Fergie, Red Nev, Alan Smith and Rio in the cunt stakes so Chelsea win 6-4 on aggregate.

Mark V said...

Thanks for the comments, it's good to know we're making an impact.

you're right about the league, although United somehow still have their 3 point lead after the weekend, the pressure is really on, especially United away to Everton at the weekend. I think they'll scrape the league though.

There is an astonishing bunch of wankers at Chelsea - you missed Terry - but a lot of people do hate Rooney and Ronaldo, so I make that 7-6 to Chelsea...

JJ said...

Ah the cunt count, what a way to start off the week. Can't think of any more from United, though Carlos Q seems like a bit of a fuck wit to me.

Any individual who goes cap in hand back to his old job after failing at something better has to be looked upon with suspicion.

Mike Phelan's dedication to short shorts while sitting next to Fergie is a bit on the familiar side too.

On another note, any team who like to refer to their stadium as the theatre of dreams instantly increase their cunt count by 50.

el said...

at least united players dont have to be reminded where they are befor they walk out on the pitch...